Bruce Campbell.

Half of you just nerdgasmed. I’ll start a new paragraph while you go change your shorts. But first, those of you who thought I meant Bill Campbell (the Rocketeer guy); I’m putting you in a time out. You can come back and read the article when you’ve thought good and hard about what you’ve done (also, Bill Campbell will never appear in Dangerous Ink until he apologizes, publicly, for the movie 'Enough'- (the only way Jennifer Lopez will learn is if we stop encouraging her).

I was a kid when 'Army of Darkness' first came to a theater near you, and its R rating and my strict ass parents kept me from seeing it. But that glistening poster and those television ads left an impression on me. There was something in the bare-chested protagonist’s machismo that was just distilled cool, like if you snorted his sweat your nostrils would sprout chest hair so thick you wouldn’t be able to breathe. 

But the Universe had a plan. 'Army of Darkness' became one of those cherished holiday films like
A Christmas Story' and 'It’s A Wonderful Life' that had a virtually constant televisionpresence. But 'AoD'’s magic was enough to make any day a holiday (except Boxing Day- there’s just something… unwholesome about Boxing Day).

Every time I stumbled across the movie, I sat down and watched it again, from whatever point it happened to be at. It became almost religious; I was a convert in the newly formed Church of the Chin. Whereas previous generations had John Wayne, or even Rambo, to idolize as the pinnacle of masculinity, we had Ash Williams: a maniac with a chainsaw hand almost as sharp as his wit, who beautiful women flocked to until he inevitably sliced off their heads- because eventually all women turn evil.

It was later, in high school, when I found out that 'Army of Darkness' was actually Evil Dead 3 dressed up in its own stand-alone adventure epic pants. Now this was before the DVD releases (or even before the IMDB- yes, I’m aware that makes me old), but a friend and I tracked down the fabled prequels, purchased them for way less than even VHS copies should go for new, and we were off. 'Evil Dead' was, at least this late in the game, only slightly more than just another horror movie, but 'Evil Dead 2' was something else, a bridge between our world and that Camelotian Neverland of Deadite slaughter, bravado and quips.

But that was not the end of Mr. Campbell. In fact, over the years, he’s amassed an impressive resume which includes producing, directing and writing on projects as diverse as his autobiography, comic books, several television series and movies, and documentaries on fandom and land management. I asked him which was the hardest for him, and he replied, “It's all difficult. It's not an easy business. Not all actors are carried around on pillows and it's hard to write a good script and direct as well. But, I'd rather be over-challenged than under-challenged.” Most recently, Campbell has returned to (relative) prominence, co-starring in the USA serial Burn Notice as retired CIA agent Sam Axe while preparing his latest directorial effort, My Name is Bruce. Bruce is a love letter to his longtime fans, especially those who can’t help but think of him as Ash. Of course, like all great love letters, the film contains a few loving kicks in the nuts. Campbell claims the film is, in part, based on his fans’ “warped perception of what I must be like as a person.” He says, “That doggone film will be out some time in 08 or my middle name isn't Lorne. We don't have a date, but watch for it. The sequel is already financed, and we're gonna shoot it fall of this year.”

Campbell has made no secret of his boredom with the cookie-cutter assembly-line of Hollywood films, preferring the improvisation and variation that established studios often shy away from. Bruce is one in a long line of independent flicks, which he says, “are the only way to go. I am drawn toward off-kilter material and indies let me do that and still make a living. For me, the choice is clear.”

One indie Campbell has specifically praised is Sideways, and that film’s costar, Paul Giamatti recently sent out an impassioned plea asking Bruce to reprise his role as Elvis in Bubba Nosferatu: Curse of the She-Vampires. I asked if that might be enough to get him to reconsider the part, and he replied: “Don Coscarelli has a very specific plan for the movie, and I don't want to get in his way.” The sound of a million fanhearts breaking cursed the cool night air.

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